146: Reflections on Christmas

I’ve been reflecting on the spirit and traditions of of Christmas’.

Human beans often have a giant book in their homes. Its called a bible and, to some, is very important. It is filled with stories, many of which I don’t understand (but, then, I am a dog).

The bible is so big that some of its stories seems to contradict and confuse each other.

For example, a very important story is about two characters called Adam and Eve who according to the bible story were the first 2 people on the earth.  Now try as I might, I can’t find out if this Eve is the same as, or related to, the other Eves talked about at the moment - Christmas Eve and New Year’s Eve. (Killing Eve?) Loose ends!

I can find no trace of Santa Claus in the bible - surely he is part of the same mythology. Or is he a Viking.

Some stories in the bible seem to overlap with those allegedly written by a chap called Shakespeare  - certainly he is another source of folklore referred to constantly by human beans.  He also overlaps  with Norse mythology - in a play called Richard III (I think), the ailing and failing king offers his kingdom for a Norse.

What’s that all about? 

And where does Robin Hood fit in? Was he related to Little Red Riding Hood?

Perhaps I should stop trying to better myself by reading. It’s only confusing me (and that’s before I try to ‘go online’ (something to do with fishing?).  Why can’t Shakespeare sand bible writers learn to be brief, pithy and amusing like birthday card writers - surely the pinnacle of written work.  Oh the jokes, the humour, the pathos, (Memories of the Three Musketeers are bubbling up.)

Instead of bettering  myself, I’m confusing myself. 

Stick to biscuits and treats, Gina …. Or you’ll drive yourself mad … like most human beans do.

Oh, and Happy New Year to you all …. whatever that mens. I’m not expecting one.